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The Colonel's Journals

by Robert Lamb

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1.
It’s so easy to forget All the things you should remember Resolutions made on New Year’s Day Broken long before September Digging the same old hole, ploughing the same old groove Acting the same old role, making the same old move Unsurprisingly - being the same old me It’s so easy to forget Things that ought to give life meaning All your principles and high ideals Lie neglected while you’re dreaming Like an athlete circling round the track I keep on running but the same old scene keeps coming back It’s so easy to forget It’s so hard to go the distance When you can be the man you’ve always been Taking the path of least resistance
2.
In a blinding flash of light I saw my life laid out before me With all its twists and turnings, all its errors and dead ends It came to me one night like a vision sent to warn me A message from the future to wise up and make amends A hundred secrets locked away A thousand demons held at bay I’m longing for the dawning of the day And hoping everything will be ok The picture started out just like a view from some jetliner A panoramic drama seen from thirty thousand feet The camera started zooming and the details getting finer Suddenly I realised the focus was on me Deep complications like underground stations Connected by magnetic lines No way of knowing which way this is going So mesmerized by the signs If you had the gift to see yourself as others see you With all your imperfections, all your defects and your flaws Don’t you know this gift might be the one thing that can free you All you have to do is lose your craving for applause
3.
You say you want to be yourself but the time is never right So you keep delaying, one more day and one more night All the anniversaries tick over one by one You dream of going back there, but every one has gone If you’re looking for perfection You can’t get there from here But if you’ll try a new direction You might get somewhere near All the things you cling to and the things you can’t let go All the things that you hold on to and the things you do for show All the baggage that you carry and the things you can’t put down Do you think they’ll help you when you’re six feet in the ground One day you’ve got all the time in the world The next you’ve got no time at all Everyday you pass that you accept the second best Is a day you can’t recover, one day less in all the rest You can look into a mirror, look into your heart Try to understand yourself, now that would be a start
4.
Footsoldier 02:50
You see yourself as a general, commanding troops and tanks In god’s eyes you’re a footsoldier, a number in the ranks Fodder for the cannon, that’s your destiny Another faceless target for an unknown enemy Footsoldier don’t raise your hopes to high Comes a day for you to do or die You dreamed of fame and fortune, drew up your battle plans Imagined men would follow when you cried out “advance” The time to dream is over and now the day has come You wake to find you’re marching to the beat of a martial drum My life is rolling down the track like a runaway train No way to stop or turn it back or start over again You polished all the stories for your biography Longing for a namecheck in the books of history In your final moments are you cowardly or brave When you realise your fate lies at the bottom of an unmarked grave
5.
You want that thing - That thing you want You feel it tease you - You feel it taunt You've got to have it just because You'll never be happy until it's yours You want that thing You want that thing - Though you know it's wrong You can't resist - The lure's too strong Your heart is burning like a forest fire Your soul is singing like a heavenly choir Everybody is out to get something for nothing They want to pick the flower before they sow the seed Don't you know that you don't get nothing for nothing And nothing good can ever come from greed You want that thing - Here we go again Six parts pleasure - Half a dozen pain You could shake it, now's your chance You could break out of your trance but
6.
Long Shadows 03:33
A simple choice, black and white Who’s to say which is right As above then so below You get to reap just what you sow The game’s evolving, the rules have changed The ancient order is rearranged Blinkered by our common sense Bewildered by the consequence We cast such long shadows How can you be so sure that you’re correct You can’t even tell your cause from your effect One door opened, another closed A question answered, another posed See the weaver at her loom Criss cross the threads of joy and gloom We cast such long shadows
7.
What if the world that you love Should be turned upside down And all of your heavens above Should tumble to the ground Would you have the will to build a new life from this pain Would you have the heart to start again If everything that you knew Should turn out to be wrong And all of the things that you do Were misguided all along Would you have the nerve to swerve and turn another way Would you rise to greet a sweet new day Try to make the best of the rest of your life Try to make the best Try to make the best of the rest of your life Make the best of the rest What if it turned out the truth Was that you've lived a lie What if I showed you the proof That no one could deny Would you cast away your chains and rise up to be free Could you change your mind to find the key
8.
City Reaches 03:35
Take some dirty tricks dress them up as politics Secret deals that steal but leave no trace See the corporate muscle do the Spring Street hustle Menace lurks behind each smiling face The city reaches up from the gutter to the stars Fighting through the dark to the light Those trampled down on the wrong side of town Are sacrificed to the night Such a tasty feast laid on for a hungry beast They praise and flatter you, feed and fatten you up! Though you protest that you’re stronger than the rest You’re no match for the venal and corrupt We know the path to progress is drenched in tears and blood We hope the gains will justify the cost But when we find the things we love lie trampled in the mud Who will dry the tears for what we’ve lost What's good for the goose they say is good for you Sucker! open up your eyes what do you see? I get so incensed that crimes so immense Can be committed by men who then walk free
9.
If you knew today all you will know tomorrow  Imagine what a nightmare that would be All the thrills, the boredom and the sorrow Engraved in granite for eternity Walk through the left door
 - you live and learn
 Walk through the right
 - you crash and burn Surrounded  by a million strident voices Wondering which talk true and which tell lies Confronted by unpalatable choices Puzzles for the worthy and the wise On the surface everything looks fine Deep down you’re sinking Holed beneath the waterline Sometimes I sit in silent meditation Watching as my breath flows in and out The object of my idle contemplation Is what it means & what it's all about
10.
When you’ve heard it all before there’s not much left to say Words that once inspired you now sound like a cliche The fabric of society feels threadbare frayed and torn The emperor stands naked as the day that he was born Constantly confused and persistently perplexed You feel too old for this world but too young for the next The people that you work with have all grown very young They speak a weird language that sounds like a foreign tongue The things they find exciting, strike you as a bore You're sure that given half a chance they’d show you out the door You get no help from Lessons that were taught to you In this brave new world You’re not sure what you ought to do Not so very long ago you were in your prime Now you’re on the scrap heap, overtaken by the time However high you climb one day you’re bound to slip and fall It’s a fact that growing old makes monkeys of us all
11.
You’re looking good - time’s been kind Just a little older, maybe a little more lined Though we fight the fade to grey Truth be told, we had our day I try to remember but sometimes I forget There are gaps in the record, there are holes in my memory net I wish I could answer all the questions in your quiz But some things are lost for ever and that’s just the way it is You’re asking me - can I recall? Bits and pieces, by no means all Just enough to reconstruct A list of those I bought or bucked As I look back upon my glittering career I contemplate the twists of fate that lead me here My mind’s a mirror, stained and cracked Mixing fiction with the fact The more I see the less is clear The more I learn the more I fear
12.
Golden Lads 03:55
I always wanted to be like you How I aspired to that ideal Everybody could agree that you Had a fair spin of the wheel Golden lads and lasses must As chimney sweepers, come to dust But in the sunlit fields of my memory You’re still a golden lad to me Looking back upon the best of times Days I would gladly live again Older now, I feel blessed that I'm A link in life's unbroken chain The show was splendid The crowd craves more But we’re denied A last encore Hour by hour, day by day Things come to pass then pass away Seize the moment, breathe it in We do not pass this way again

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A collection of old fashioned pop songs loosely bound by themes of reflection on the vanity and contingency of existence. Now if only I would listen to my own advice...

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released January 13, 2013

All songs, performances and recording by Robert Lamb

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Robert Lamb Melbourne, Australia

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